The "Real" First Thanksgiving

Vol. 1 | Issue 2 |November 2018

The "Real" First Thanksgiving
by Patrick Boland (aka The VinReaper)

Well we have come to "that" time of the year once again. The time of year when family members frantically make their way home for the most important meal of the year, the celebration of Thanksgiving. Though it is my favorite holiday, because it is truly about enjoying time with family and friends. I also do enjoy most of the side dishes, but it is the mainstay of the meal itself that is, more times than not, a dried out, flavorless, tryptophan saturated member of the species Phasianidae Meleagridinae (aka Turkey family). We would think that we as a people would have gotten tired of the Turkey Nightmare, but I am guessing the American people are very proud of their traditions, since we have so few of them, we must hang on for dear life to what we have.
 
We never seem to question why we even have turkey as the centerpiece to this Oh, so important meal. My take on this situation is as such.....
 
From the point of view of the Native Wampanoag Indians. One morning, while hunting for game, fishing of the shore and scavenging local shellfish, a brave of the tribe looks out over the shoreline and sees things that are similar to the canoe he and his father made a few summers ago. This one though is much different and is coming towards the shore with oddly dressed people. Whilst in the background a massive construction floats atop the water with many others aboard it and is strewn with rope and billowing fabrics with symbols on them. These giant machinations terrified this young brave. So, he runs back to the tribe to report what he has seen to the tribal elders. They come to witness this themselves and after doing so come to the conclusion that these Invaders were much more advanced then themselves. The tribe felt that if they tried to repel them that it would only result in their own demise. They thought to themselves and said, "What should we do?!" One quick thinking elder reminded the others of the last time he visited his In-Laws Teepee and had the worst meal ever so that he never went back to visit. Hence, the elders contrived an ingenious plan to protect their land and way of life. They would befriend these newcomers and invite them to dinner. But not any ordinary dinner! A dinner that would undoubtedly tell these foreigners that the food here is absolutely terrible and that there is no sense in staying. They had pungent root vegetables, hard to eat gourds, dry unleavened breads and as the main attraction a stringy dried out bird that no member of the tribe wants to eat.
 
I say this because, as I stated at the beginning of my story, our young brave was hunting for game (Venison, Pheasant, Wild Boar, etc.), fishing for delicious trout or bass and scavenging for delightful shellfish. None of which make it to our celebratory table. Why do they not? Well, you no longer have to ask yourself why because the story I just told you, by deduction, has to be true. Wouldn't you rather have Venison Filet Mignon or Roasted Pork on Thanksgiving. It's what we should have been having all along. We have been cheated all these years!!!
 
At least, the pilgrims brought the tradition of wine with them and were able to wash down their first meal. And now we can do the same! So, what I am thankful for is the wine on the table! What would Thanksgiving be like without it!

 
That being said. Here are some great wines to help at your Thanksgiving table.

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